I am so thankful that God doesn't give up. I mean, He NEVER gives up. He NEVER quits. He keeps on loving, forgiving, helping, guiding... FOREVER. And I am SO very thankful for that.
After I came back to the US from living in Australia, I had some pretty rough times. My life had been turned UPside DOWN. Wowsa. I never blamed God and I never questioned God. I think I felt a little bit good about that... the fact that I still trusted God and believed in His love and goodness. I thought I was doing well and handling everything the way I should.
But you know, when you're going through a rough time, something's gonna give. God was my Lord and the person I really worked at living my life for. My kids were definitely FIRST priority in my life. But for the first time IN my life, I put myself... second. Okay, let's back up and recount: 1. God, 2. Kids, 3. Me. As an adult, I had never put myself in that position before. At that point, for the first time in my life, I cut myself slack and I felt like I "deserved".... I didn't see any of this then. I treated myself to .. things I wanted. Nothing bad, or wrong. I didn't start living a life of mega sin or let go of my standards or my morals. But I just FELT like I "deserved"... something. My life was DIFFICULT, so didn't that "allow" me something...?
Like I said, at the time I didn't see it or think a thing of it. But with that feeling of entitlement and going through a period of incredible hurt in my life, I let down on the job of keeping my heart where it should have been. I began a time of what I'd call serving myself. That sounds odd, and might not be the right way to phrase it, but that is the heart of what I was doing.
Just recently, God has allowed me to see the path that I started down back then. He has helped me to understand how some things in my life now, have been affected by an attitude that wasn't right or as submissive as it should have been. He's been patient with me. He's been loving with me. He's been forgiving with me. He is helping me and He is guiding me -- ever so gently -- back to the place where He wants me.
How can you not be awestruck and thankful for a God like that?!
(Linking up with Carina at A Punk, A Pumpkin and A Peanut for Thankful Thursday.)